Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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