I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize