four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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