I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
