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• (206): View more from Washington

  So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?

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• (818): View more from California

  Its about making memories worth repressing

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• (631): View more from New York

  It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (949): View more from California

  this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.

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• (916): View more from California

  My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (956): View more from Texas

  he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.

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• (914): View more from New York

  She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED

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