8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
