she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
