Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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