Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
