Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Randomize
