Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
