i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
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I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
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oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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