I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
