dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
