I am spending my child support on dildos
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
