When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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