SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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