Small penises have feelings too.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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