I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize