So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
