im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
