you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
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come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
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Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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