I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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