What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
