butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
