I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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