you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
