3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Randomize
