You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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