Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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