no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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