i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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