I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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