Your tits are I can't wait for
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
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Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
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Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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