I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
