Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
