So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
vagina is talking i cant
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
