she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
