once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
