so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
