I like to think it a success when the cops are called
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
People in love make me want to vomit
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
