Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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