I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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