for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
You're earring is so big in my mouth
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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