that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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