what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
