Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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