I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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