he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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