she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
