did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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